Why fit in when you can stand out!
Posted on 8th June 2022 at 12:18
How much time is spent trying to fit in? Saying or doing the right thing, permanent people pleasing to feel inclusion.
Again and again this repetitive behaviour takes hold, but why? Why do we do it?
I have tried fitting in on many occasions, stepping out of my own skin so I could merge in to the comfort of those around me. Did it make me happy? Temporarily maybe but the same insecurities always resurface.
Aren’t most of us at some-point all doing the same thing? Potentially stood in a room of people going along with the majority, the conversation for an easy life - to feel inclusion. Possibly suppressing how we actually feel, what we truly want - for an easy life? To maintain connection? Trying to blend in rather than freely be who we are.
‘We find connection to avoid rejection!’
I’ve finally woken up to see that the right people notice you anyway. The natural beauty we all hold, that smile which lights up someone’s world. There is no shame in being who you are, that’s what makes you uniquely perfect! Competing with others, unwarranted.
Why do we give so much concern to what others think and say?
More often than not, yes you’ve got it, that dragon rears it’s head again - fear of rejection rises once more.
Nobody likes this feeling, in turn we can become desperate to find meaning. Always trying to fit in can take us away from ourselves creating patterns that aren’t healthy, this search never ending if we allow.
Does finding a connection externally provide a meaningless divert from our own insecurities? Possibly for a short while but unless we face the things that hold us back and steal our confidence they just rise again and again until our lessons are learnt.
Until we uncover the full beauty of who we really are, imperfections and all we are never free.
Working on finding a connection within is transformative. It can take time and be confronting, but when acceptance of of who we are is gained, not rejecting the parts we don’t like, we can feel freedom and happiness. Confidence grows and the freedom of being who you are is liberating, finding true connection with something that really matters. You.
The fear of being rejected can be so strong that we avoid certain things. Applying for that job, going to the party? We want to connect in anyway we can, often at detriment to who we are or how we want to be.
True connections are established when we slow down, acknowledging what we think and feel. Bringing acceptance to this and then in our own time taking the action we need.
Can you make a connection with yourself instead of losing yourself for fear of being rejected?
Be more like you, stand out as you are. Through Mindfulness and Meditation I have built this connection and am welcoming myself, the good and bad. And despite my flaws - do you know what I’m happy to stand out now and again rather than hide myself away.
Don’t waste time fitting in, you were born to stand out!
‘Feel the fear and do it anyway!’
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